


begin again

by xxpaynoxx



Series: aventures à paris [4]
Category: Football RPF
Genre: Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Reunited and It Feels So Good, god these two are painful, i miss them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-23
Updated: 2018-03-23
Packaged: 2019-04-06 20:17:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14064747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxpaynoxx/pseuds/xxpaynoxx
Summary: i've been spending the last eight months thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end.Neymar returns.





	begin again

The invitation is in a white envelope with a cursive silver font.

It’s clear that Antonela has made the invitations; there is no way Leo would have had the patience or the eye to make a card look so elegant like Anto. Said card appeared in Neymar’s mailbox almost two days after he had shoved that photo album deep into a chest in his room, knowing that he’d never have what he had with Leo those months ago again.

Destiny, it seemed, had other ideas.

He opens the letter with careful fingers, making sure not to rip the envelope too badly as he slides the invitation out of the envelope. It’s on hard cardstock, with the same silver font slanting across the page, inviting Neymar to a New Year’s Eve bash. There’s an RSVP number and all of that nonsense, but Neymar can’t tear his eyes away from where Leo signed the card with his slanting, messy signature.

His writing is so _Leo_ , so careful but still messy that it hurts Neymar’s heart.

Looking at _writing_ was reminding him of Leo.

He was _fucked_.

He slides the letter in a container of various other letters and postcards, to collect dust. He didn’t plan on attending the party, or any party that Leo threw; it was just too painful. What would be the purpose of him going all the way home just to be disappointed in Leo treating him like a friend rather than...whatever they had?

It was worse when he thought about what Leo had said before he left, how nothing would change between them and things would be the same, there would just be more space between them. But everything did change, as it always would. They grew apart, Neymar thrusted into a country that spoke language he barely knew and he felt like a little boy at Santos all over again.

And where was Leo? Living his life, as he had before Neymar came to Spain, and how he would when he left.

But of course, Neymar always caves for Leo, so he writes back an RSVP (a day past the due date, but he still gets a response back through text from Leo saying thanks.

He also adds “I can’t wait to see you.”

Neymar’s heart _does not_ almost drop out of his body.)

**...**

The party isn’t as crowded as Neymar had believed it would be.

There’s Geri, looking well-put together in his black suit and thin black tie, hand tight on Shakira’s waist as the two wander around the party with tall, skinny champagne glasses filled to the brim with the bubbly drink.

The party itself is being held in a rented ballroom, to no surprise from anybody. Antonela knew how to throw a party properly, with a DJ and everything. Neymar had yet to see the organizers of the event, however; both had been elusive all night, so Neymar had stuck to Geri and, when Geri had wandered off with Shak, Rafinha came to the rescue.

The two bachelors had been standing next to the bar, sipping at their champagne, and that’s when Neymar sees him.

Or rather, sees him _dancing_.

Now, Neymar knew Leo could dance; he’d seen him after games, letting loose after they won trophies and tournaments and derbies, but this was something entirely different. He was dancing, but not as a foolish boy half-drunk on whatever drink Geri smuggled into the locker room; he was _properly_ dancing.

He and Antonela twirl across the white dancefloor, the black lights making his white shirt look blue. His black pants are tighter than usual, and his hair keeps trying to fall into his eyes as he brushes it off his forehead with his hands.

Antonela is in a shimmering silver dress that clings to every curve perfectly. Her small baby bump doesn’t show as much in it, and it billows out as Leo spins her around, hand held high in the air with a white smile more blinding than the ceiling lights.

Neymar’s chest feels tight, and he can tell Rafinha is looking at him quizzically, trying to figure his friend out. “What’s the matter, bro? How long has it been since you’ve seen each other?” he asks. Neymar takes a long swig of champagne, grimacing as it burns going down his throat. “I don’t know...four months? Maybe more,” he rasps, the champagne’s bubbles killing his voice.

Rafinha chews at his lip.

“You two have a lot to talk about, don’t you.”  
  
Neymar nods, nervously sipping from his glass. He doesn’t even notice he’s downed it all until he tries to sip again and he gets nothing but air.

It’s that moment that Leo approaches.

He doesn’t miss a beat, walking up and breaking into the biggest smile Neymar has ever seen on his face. “Ney,” he whispers, bringing him into a tight hug that all but crushes two of Neymar’s ribs in the process. Neymar returns it, albiet in a much lighter fashion, before resuming his leaning stance against the bar.

Rafinha takes that as his cue to leave, and Leo grabs Neymar’s hand, placing the empty champagne glass on the bar. 

“Can we talk? Alone?”  
  
At this point, all of Neymar’s bodily functions other than pumping oxygen to his brain have all but stopped working, so he can’t do anything but nod and let Leo lead him into the hallway.

Leo picks a room far from the ballroom, the only sound that can be heard from the party is the muted boom of the bass. The room is small, with a few chairs and a futon that Leo sits on, patting the spot next to him. Neymar sits, surprised that his body complies with that, and they just stare at each other.

Leo’s hand comes up to cup Neymar’s face, the pad of his thumb soft against his skin as he brushes it across Neymar’s cheekbone. His eyes are unreadable, but there’s definitely something there that Neymar just can’t seem to understand.

“Why didn’t you say anything?”  
  
He feels Leo’s hand freeze in place and he frowns, but doesn’t move his hand away.

“I wanted to. I wanted to so badly, Ney, but I just couldn’t-“  
  
“ _Why?_ ”

Leo’s mouth hangs open, but no words come out, and that’s when Neymar loses it.

“Why didn’t you call, or text, or _something_? Do you know how heartbroken I’ve been for _months_ because you said nothing would change and then everything did? I was a fucking idiot for thinking nothing would change, and I guess I was a fucking idiot for believing that you were any different than anyone else I’ve been with. It’s like as soon as I left, I didn’t even exist anymore, and do you know how much that _hurts_ , Leo? Feeling like you didn’t even make a difference in anyone’s lives? Because that’s how it fucking felt, and it felt like you’d ripped my heart out of my chest with your bare hands and just watched me bleed out.”

Neymar’s chest is heaving after he’s done, his cheeks wet, and Leo’s face is warped from new tears gathering in his eyes. He’s shaking, so badly that when Leo draws him into his chest, he can feel his body trembling against Leo’s still, strong one.

Leo runs his fingers through his hair, and Neymar can’t see his face, but when Leo speaks, Neymar knows he’s about to cry.

“I wanted to tell you how much you meant to me. God, I wanted to tell you so badly, but when you left, I thought I wouldn’t miss you so much if I simply cut you out of my life. It worked for a few weeks, but then I started really missing you. I started missing your jokes and smiles at practice, your hugs after I scored goals, everything that made you _you_ , Ney. I’ll never be able to tell you how much you mean to me, what you’ve done to me and this club and the family we built here. We all miss you, and that video I was finally able to reach out to you to tell you how much we miss you. I meant every word I said-”

“Shut up and kiss me.”

He feels Leo stiffen against him, and Neymar pulls himself out of Leo’s lap to face him, their thighs touching and faces inches away from each other. Leo looks awestruck, eyes wide and mouth slightly ajar, but he complies with Neymar’s sudden request, grabbing the back of Neymar’s head and smashing their lips together.

The ferocity of the kiss takes Neymar aback almost immediately; Leo is kissing him like he’d never kissed him before, all visceral and animalistic, like he’s never going to be able to kiss him like this again.

(And, well...that’s probably true, right?)

(Neymar hopes not. Instead, he lets Leo put his hands where he wants, lets him lead him back to his hotel room, lets him do with him what he wants, because _this_ is what he’s been missing. He’s been missing this intimacy he had with Leo. He missed the late night calls, the casual locker room hookups, all of that. But he missed Leo _himself_ the most, the way Leo’s body curved perfectly around him as they cuddled post-sex, and the way Leo’s chin fits perfectly in the crook of his shoulder.

There will be time to talk about everything; where to go from here, what’s going to happen now, all of that. But for right now, Neymar revels in this moment.

And deep down, he’s glad he came back.)

**Author's Note:**

> SO sorry for this wait. I know, it's an NYE fic. and it's march. i apologize. but there will be more very soon, what with all this news of neymar going to madrid.


End file.
